Another year, another number. At what point do we, the loved ones, start to question why we are doing this to ourselves?

Every year, why do we insist on joining the mad holiday rush? Who dictates that we have to? And at what point do we step off the mouse trap and say, ‘Look, many thanks for the invite, but I’ve decided to keep my head on my shoulders this year.’

Instead it’s like we are all programmed, come this time of year – and sadly it’s a program that doesn’t always have a happy ending. Life is not a television advertisement. Each year families are completely decimated because, all of us, want to spend our holidays with, all of you, and no-one stops to think about the very real risk we take to make this happen.

I am not a holiday hater, please don’t misunderstand my motivation for writing this piece. I love nothing more than gathering my family under the one roof come the holidays. I was raised on a diet of Christmas traditions and tinsel and I loved every minute of it.

And if there were no risk attached, I would recommend the same to any person who cared to ask my opinion on the matter. But with two small children, and family scattered between Sydney, Bowral and the Far South Coast, I’m reading the road-death-toll year-after-year and I’m wondering if I’m ready to make a new tradition?

The tradition of slowing things right down, not just behind the wheel, but also in our decision making, which tends to becomes hyper and slightly hysterical come the holiday period.

The funny thing is, I haven’t driven further than 20 kilometres since before Christmas. This year the family came to us. But what’s not funny, is the thought of any of the beautiful family and friends, who drove hours and hours, to spend time with my family, dead, because society says that’s what we are supposed to do. That we should all get on the same road, at roughly the same time, filled with adrenaline, and impatient to ‘make the most’ of our holidays.

There are statistics for every argument; there is talk of black-spot funding; there are timetables for peak and off-peak road usage; there are traffic apps you can download; we have safety bags and cruise control and rest points; and now there is talk of mandatory first aid and fire extinguishers (a fabulous idea). 

But in the meantime, here’s my idea –  let’s catch up another time. Alive. Safe.

All the funding that’s spent on fixing our roads is great, especially in rural and regional areas. And I applaud NSW Police for taking a hard stance and widely communicating their “disappointment” at this year’s statistics. But at what point do we step out from the pack and take some personal responsibility?

It’s true that you can’t control the actions of every other driver on the road. But, what we can do, is not all be on the road at the same time. So why are we?