ANYONE asking Eurobodalla mayor Lindsay Brown why he did not chair the past two council meetings is likely to receive a more candid response than they bargain for.
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If you are a bloke of a certain age, don’t be surprised if the talk turns to incontinence, nappies and erectile dysfunction.
He’s also likely to gently push you to have a prostate cancer check.
The 56-year-old councillor openly shared this week what he has kept secret from all but a few people since late last year – a diagnosis of prostate cancer.
Cr Brown got the news a week before Christmas, via a phone call from his surgeon in the middle of a Moruya Business Chamber meeting and party.
“It was a shock,” Cr Brown said.
“I went back in and finished the meeting.
“I don’t think anyone noticed.
“Then I went home and gave my wife the bad news, which was a very difficult time for us.”
The following day he drove to Albury to see his seriously ill best mate and childhood friend – Peter – arriving too late to say goodbye.
“He passed away that night and I did not get to see him,” Cr Brown said.
He read at Peter’s funeral, knowing he would return for surgery to remove his prostate and all the complications that might bring.
However being on intimate terms with ‘male protective underwear’ and his male parts no longer working so well, both pale into insignificance compared to his relief at being alive.
“I wanted to see my daughter get married and have children,” he said.
On Friday, Cr Brown received the all-clear after January’s surgery.
“The best words you can hear from a specialist are ‘clear margins’,” a relieved Cr Brown said.
The cancer, while it had breached its inner capsule, had not breached the prostate and no further marker antigens were visible in his blood.
Now, Cr Brown is on a mission to get men to talk about disease that kills too many.
He’s also determined to be upfront about the temporary but confronting side effects that follow surgery.
“That is what I want to get out the male of the species: don’t be embarrassed by this process,” he said.
“I have had the operation, I have removed the prostate, I have pretty much a cure and I will be able to live life as normal, once I get through the side effects.
“When a male turns 50, they should get tested and preferably have a physical exam.
“I think most men have a challenge to openly talk about their illness.
“They are reticent in going to doctors when they don’t feel well.
“I have had friends who have not done that and have passed away because of their own embarrassment and own bravado.
“Most blokes think, ‘I will be right’.”
Cr Brown was never in that camp.
His own father had prostate cancer and his mother died of another cancer at the age of just 58.
“I have always had regular checks,” he said.
Cr Brown’s voice choked on many occasions through this interview, most notably when he talked about the loss of his friend.
But he was at his strongest wanting men to be open about the illness and its side-effects – and he has very strong views now on male public toilets: they are too small and have no bins in the cubicle.
He’s also thanked former Mayor Fergus Thomson, who has undergone two recent brain operations for tumours.
“Ferg inspired me to keep going,” he said.